It is not easy to have conversations with Japanese. Japanese have great difficulty in saying no to anything because it is ingrained that negative disrupts the harmony of a situation. Consequently, Japanese seem to say yes to almost anything – which should be interpreted as “Yes, I hear what you’re saying….. but that doesn’t necessarily mean that I agree with you.”
Japanese would respond to a negatively stated question (for example, “Don’t you have a car?”) differently than would Americans. To answer that question, the Japanese would say, “Yes” – meaning “Yes, I do not have a car.”
Not only is the language complex, there are also many unsaid among the Japanese. Here are some tips and advice on acceptable ways to have conversations with Japanese.
• Bowing is the traditional greeting. It is a sign of humility and respect.
• Proper posture is also regarded as important, so avoid slouching in your chair or plunking your feet up on the nearest table.
• Never do anything that will bring any form of embarrassment to a Japanese. This causes the loss of face.
• Never express affection in public, except with children.
• Smiling may be a way of hiding embarrassment. Similarly, showing the wide-open mouth (as when laughing uproariously) is considered rude.
• Pointing with fingers and loud sniffling of the nose should be avoided.
• Directly eye contact is not common.
• Handshakes may be given with a limp hand.
• Western women may be treated with either indifference or with abject curiosity. This is no reflection on gender. It is a result of centuries of Japan being a male-oriented society.
• Any conversation in Japan is likely to be roundabout, punctuated with periods of silence, excessively polite, and devoid of strong declarations or opinions.
“Do’s and Taboos of Using English Around the World” by Roger E. Axtell. Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger, and neither apple or pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. The boxing rings are square and guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same while a wise man and a wise guy opposite? How can overlook and oversee be opposites. How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
House can burn up as it burns down. We fill in a form by filling it out. An alarm goes off by going on. When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
Look at the other side, English is invented by people and this reflects the creatively of the human race. Look at these sentences and see how creative we are in playing with the language to confuse others.
• The bandage was wound around the wound. • The farm was used to produce produce. • The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. • The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. • Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. • When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. • I did not object to the object. • The insurance was invalid for the invalid. • There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. • They were too close to the door to close it. • A seamstress and a sewer fell into a sewer. • The wind was too strong to wind the sail. • After a number of injections my jaw got number. • Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear. • I had to subject the subject to a series of tests. • How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
Read the book “Who moved my cheese?” and found that there are something we can learn from the book about how to cope with change.
What is our Cheese?
In the book, “Cheese” is a defined as a metaphor for what we want in life – whether it is a good job, relationship, money, promotion, house, freedom, health, recognition, or spiritual peace of mind. Each of us has our own ideas of what our cheese is, and we pursue it because we believe it will make us happy. However, the sad thing is that if we get it, we often become attached to it. And if we lose it, or when it is taken away from us, it can be traumatic.
What can we learn from the story?
(a) When the situation changed and our cheese has been moved, we will have to change and move with the cheese.
(b) We could use the mistakes we made in the past to plan for the future.
(c) Be aware of the needs to keep things simple, be flexible and move quickly. When facing change, complex brains and human emotions do complicate things. Do simple things that work when things change.
(d) There is no need to over-complicate things or confuse ourselves with fearful beliefs. Our new beliefs will encourage our new behaviours. When we change what we believe, we will change what we do.
(e) We should make preparation for the big changes when we realised little things began to change. When we see how changes can make things better, we will get more interested in making the change happen.
(f) We need to adapt fast and if we do not adopt in time, we might well not adopt at all.
(g) The biggest inhibitor to change lies within ourselves; nothing gets better until we change. Those who can’t change may have to pay a price for it.
(h) Don’t think that the old cheese is our only cheese. There is always new cheese out there whether we recognise it at the time or not.
(i) We resist changing because we are afraid of change, though sometimes we are not even aware that we are afraid. Some fears should be respected as it can keep us out of the real danger; fears do force us to take corrective actions. We will feel awarded when we past our fear and enjoy the adventure.
(j) Be open minded enough to learn something new, act differently and adapt in time to help us succeed. It’s better to initiate change than try to react and adjust to the change. Maybe we should change the ways we do things.
(k) Although people are trying to copy with the unexpected changes, many do not know a good way to handle change. The fastest way to change is to laugh at our own folly, then we can let go and quickly move on.
Source : “Who Moved My Cheese?” by Spencer Johnson. Published by G.P. Putnam’s Sons, New York.
Professor Albert Morabian, from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, has done a one-to-one social communication study and discovered that communication happens on three levels:
According to the study, visual communication is the most powerful of the three levels. During an interaction, if our words and body language are inconsistent, most properly people will believe more of what our body language says than the words we use. This is because our emotions are conveyed through our body.
There are many ways that the body communicates. Here are some examples of what some actions can mean to others.
• Rapid eye blinking When you see someone’s eyes blinking rapidly, more than eight to ten times per minute, chances are the person disagrees with you.
• Dilated pupils Pupils that are open suggest interest.
• Steeping fingers This is usually a sign of power. People who want to project authority will often steeple their hands by putting them together with only the fingertips touching.
• Clenched fists Clenched hands can indicate frustration.
• Folded arms When people fold their arms in front or in back, they may be protecting themselves. They might also be defensive – or even chilly!
• Hands touching mouth or nose This could be a signal that the person is lying.
• Raised eyebrow Raised eyebrows usually mean surprise.
• Tilting head forward Leaning forward the speaker shows interest. It means the listener is tuned in. When the hand is supporting the head, the listener is usually bored.
• Leaning away This posture can mean disagreement or lack of interest. If the listener suddenly lean back, change the subject or direction of the conversation.
• Drumming fingers This gesture could mean frustration or irritation.
Source: “Knockout Presentation – How to deliver your message with ……” by Diana DiResta. Published by Raffles, an imprint of SNP Editions Pte Ltd.
Happy people don’t just accept change, they embrace it! They are the people who say: “Why would I want my next first years to be like my last five?”
Next time you are upset, remember it’s not so much people who make you angry, as your thoughts about them. Whatever thoughts are causing pain, they are only thoughts. You can change a thought.
The happiest people don’t worry too much about whether life is fair or not. They just get on with it.
If you want more peace of mind, stop labeling. Everything that happens as “good” or “bad”.
If you think the world is against you, it is. Blaming other people doesn’t work. When you fight life, Life always wins.
If you don’t know what you like doing, maybe you stopped listening to yourself years ago. Many of us became different people in order to please everyone else.
The more emotional you are about things, the less control you have. Most people are very emotional about money – so they are out of control.
In order to have something in your life and keep it, whether it’s job, or a relationship, you have to be comfortable with it. To make money and keep it, you must be comfortable with money!
In order to have something in your life and keep it – whether it’s job, or a relationship -you have to be comfortable with it. To make money and keep it, you must be comfortable with money!
Source: “Happiness in a Nutshell” by Andrew Matthews. Published by Seashell Publishers Pte Ltd, Australia.
Two men went to a meat store. The first man told the meat seller, “Sanggil, I want a pound of meat!”. The seller gave him a pound of meat. The second man then said, “ Mr Park, I want a pound of meat.” The seller gave him a piece of meat that weights more than a pound. When the first man protested, the seller said, “These are different deals. You bought the meat from Sanggil, while he bought the meat from Mr Park.”
A doctor once advised his patient that if he ate beef, his illness would be cured. It so happened that the man smelt roast beef and was cured at once. The man who was roasting the beef then asked him to pay, saying that the smell had made him well. They argued and, unable to settle their differences, brought the matter before a judge. The judge then asked for some coins. Jingling the coins, the judge turned to the beef roaster and said, “He only smelt the beef, so you only need to listen to the coins.”
A poor scholar took his wife’s borrowed money to try his luck as a peddler. He found that rice cakes were selling at a penny each in certain place, a penny for two at another, and a penny for three at yet another. He reasoned that if he were to buy the cheapest rice cakes and sell them where they fetched the highest prices, he would make large profits. So, he bought as many cakes as possible at the lowest price and went to the place where the most expensive rice cakes were sold. But on reaching the place after a three-day journey, he found that all his rice cakes had spoilt. In the end, he threw all the rice cakes into the river.
A woman asked a witch to find out the sex of her unborn baby. After sprinkling rice gains and screaming a strange chant, the witch announce, “ On behalf of the mother, I declare the unborn to be a girl.” The family members who heard this frowned their disappointment. Seeing that, the switch added, “But on behalf of the father, and if I did not get it wrong, I declare the unborn to be a boy.”
A certain general always listened to his wife. One day he gave an order to his men, “Those who listened to their wives were to gather under the red flag, and the rest to gather under the blue flag.” All the men stood under the red flag except one soldier who stood under the blue flag. Seeing that, the general exclaimed, “All are husband who had listen to their wives, except for one.” The lone soldier replied, “Sir, I’ve been warned by my wife against mixing with others. She said they will certainly talk about women when they’re in a group.”
A village schoolteacher once said to the class that he would reward anyone who could get him to leave the room. A clever student said, “Sir, I can’t do that. But if you are outside, I can make you come in.” The teacher left the room and said, “Now make me come in.” “See, I’ve already got you to leave the room,” said the boy.
Source : “Jokes, Comic Tales and Proverbs from Korea” complied and retold by Chong Kum Fatt. Published by Asiapac Books Pte Ltd.
Wine is an alcoholic beverage obtained from the fermentation of the juice of freshly gathered grapes. There are four major classifications of wines
(1) Table wine
Table wine, also known as still wine or natural wine, can be white, red or rose. These wines are consumed primarily as complements to food. Table wine has an alcoholic content of 12 to 14 per cent.
Red wine is made from red grapes that are crushed gently, stripped off their stalks and the resulting juice (called “must”) is fermented together with the skins, pips and pulps in large vats. Red wine gets its colour from the skin of the grapes.
White wine is made from the juice of either red or white grapes. For making of white wine, the skin of both the red and white grapes have to be taken out of the vat before fermentation. This is to prevent the skin from colouring the juices. White wine is not water clear, it is a little yellowish or yellowish green.
Rose wine gets its colour by allowing the juice of red grapes to remain in contact with the skins and pips for about 72 hours. Another method of making rose wine is to blend both white and red wines in order to get the right colour.
For the producing of still wine, grapes are first picked, sorted, weighted and transported to the presses. After pressing, the resulting juice (“must”) is put into Vats where the sugar and yeast present in the grape juice will start the fermentation process. The length of the fermentation period will depend on the type of wine that is desired to produce. Sweet wine is taken out of the vat before the fermentation is completed whereby the sugar content is still present. Dry wine is allowed to ferment in order for the sugar in the grape juice to convert into alcohol. The fermentation process will be stopped naturally when all the sugar is converted into alcohol.
(2) Sparkling wine
Sparking wine, such as champagne, is obtained when the wine is normally allowed to go through a second fermentation in the bottle. Sparkling wine has carbon dioxide within the bottle and this causes the wine to be effervescent (gassy/bubbly). There are three methods in producing sparkling wines.
The Champagne Method, known as “Method Champenosie” in French, is done through the same process as producing of still wine. It is only after the first fermentation, cane sugar and yeast culture are added and the wine is bottled and left to go through the second fermentation.
The Tank Method is to allow the second fermentation to take place under the pressure in vast stainless steel tanks.
The third method of producing sparkling wine is simply carbonating a still wine, in the same way as in making lemonade or tonic water.
(3) Fortified wine
These are wines whereby brandy or other spirits is added to increase the alcoholic content or to stop the fermentation process. The reason for adding spirits is to increase the strength of the wine and if the spirit is added while the must is fermenting, the fermentation will cease. In this case, a sweet wine will be produced as not all the sugars are converted into alcohol. The alcoholic content for fortified wine is around 16 to 20 per cent.
Fortified wines, such as Port wine, Sherry, Madeira and Marsala, are most commonly drunk before or after meals and are frequently used in cooking.
Most of the Port wines come from Portugal, though there some port wines produced in California, Chile, South Africa and Spain. Port wine is made from both white and red grapes. To make port, the fermentation is stopped by the addition of brandy. Some different types of Port wine are Ruby, Full-Port, Red Port, Tawny Port, White Port, Vintage Port and Crusted Port.
Sherry comes from Spain. The different between Port wine and Sherry is that the basis for Port wine is sweet and the basis for Sherry is dry. This is due to the fermentation in the Port wine is being stopped and therefore some of the sugar are preserved. As for Sherry, the fermentation process is not disturbed. Some different types of Sherry are Fino, Olorosa, Brown, Amoroso and Cream.
Madeira is made from the mixing old wines with young wines. It can be drunk as an aperitif or as a dessert wine. Some examples of Madeira are Sercial, Verdelho, Bual and Malmsey.
(4) Aromatised Wine
These are wines that have been fortified and flavoured with various fruits, herbs & spices. Some examples of aromatised wine are Martini, Cinzano, Dubonnet and Noilly Prat. The alcohol content for aromatised wine is between 15% and 20%.
A national language is the language of a political, cultural and social unit. It is general developed and used as a symbol of national unity. Its functions are to identity the nation and unite its people. The national language in Singapore is Malay. It reflects both the historical and geographical position of the country.
An official language is a language which may be used for government business. Its function is primary utilitarian rather than symbolic. Singapore has four official languages – Malay, Mandarin, English and Tamil.
Mother tongue is the superordinate language of one’s official ethnic group. So, the mother tongue of a ‘Chinese’ is deemed to be Mandarin, that a ‘Malay’ Malay and that a ‘Tamil’ or ‘Malayalee’ Tamil.
The first language is the main medium of education studied, which is now always English.
The second language is the other language studied, which is usually the official mother tongue.
The term bilingual is often used in Singapore to refer to a person who has succeeded in both the language learnt at school.
A major language is defined as (a) a language which is spoken as a native language by more than 25% of the population or more than one million people in the society, (b) an official language of the nation and (c) is the language of education of over 50% of the secondary school graduates of the nation. There are five major languages in Singapore – English, Mandarin, Malay, Tamil and Hokkien.
A lingua franca is a language used for communication between people whose first language differs. Both Malay and English could be qualified as the lingua franca in Singapore for inter-group communication. Mandarin has also gained ground to become the lingua franca among the Chinese in Singapore.
Source : “English in New Cultural Contexts”. Published by The Singapore Institute of Management. “An Introduction to Sociolinguistics” by Janet Holmes. Published by Pearson Education Limited, UK.
According to Dr Janet Goodrich, a psychology, we often restrict energy flow through our whole body by unconsciously holding our breath when we want to yawn. This ‘impolite’ yawn is, in fact, the most naturally freeing and the fullest kind of breathing possible when we have a spontaneous need for fresh oxygen, stretching of muscles, and a change of pace.
In her book, “Natural Vision Improvement – Improve your eyesight and enjoy life more”, Goodrich listed the following benefits of yawning.
(1) Yawning brings fresh oxygen into our body cells, including those in the eyes and brain.
(2) Yawning contracts and expands muscles from the top of our head to the tips of our toes, including those in the eyes, neck, shoulder and belly.
(3) Yawning is capable of changing our emotional states from negative to positive.
(4) Yawning changes the pH of the blood reducing toxicity levels in our whole body system.
(5) Yawning opens our minds to new experiences and ideas.
(6) Yawning helps to detoxify our liver and to balance the energy in the liver meridian.
(7) Yawning wakes us up in the morning and clams us down for deep restful sleep at night.
(8) Yawning stimulates the production of refreshing tears that bathe our naturally tired eyes and moisten the chronically dry eyes.
(9) Yawning relaxes our solar plexus area and tummy muscles that accompany indigestion.
Source: “Natural Vision Improvement” by Janet Goodrich. Published by Penguin Books Australia Ltd.
