Power refers to the capacity that A has to influence the behavior of B, so that B does something he would not otherwise do. Using the power would enable the power-holder to be able to manipulate the behavior of others. According to French and Raven, there are 5 sources of power.

• Legitimate Power

The formal position of a person in an organization does come with some authority. This source of power is based on the formal rights one receives as a result of holding an authoritative position or role in an organization.

• Reward Power

This depends on the leader’s ability to reward subordinates for compliance. Subordinates comply in their superior’s requests in the belief that their behaviours will be rewarded. The definition of rewards would limit to material rewards, such as favourable job assignments, preferred vacation schedules, good performance appraisal that leads to higher increase in salary and promotions and others.

• Coercive Power

The coercive base depends on fear. One reacts to this power out of fear of the negative ramification that might result if one fails to comply. It may in the form of official reprimands, less desirable work assignments or lower rating in annual appraisal.

• Referent Power

Referent power develops out of others’ admiration for a person and their desire to model their behavior and attitudes after that person. Referent power is associated with leaders who possess admirable characteristics, charisma or excellent reputation.

• Expertise Power

This is the influence that derives from specialized skills or knowledge, such as having the ability to access and control unique and valuable information. However, this source of power is narrow in scope because a person’s expertise is generally limited to specific task areas. Also, the rapid technological changes could cause a person’s skills to be obsolete easily.

(1) What goes in dry, comes out wet and gives a lot of satisfaction? – A tea bag.

(2) What four-letter word ending in “k” do men use to mean sex? – Talk.

(3) What is the safest time for sex? – When your boyfriend’s away.

(4) What’s man’s definition of a romantic evening? – Sex.

(5) How do you keep a man from wanting sex? – Marry him.

(6) What’s the best way to keep a man happy in bed? – Bring the TV into the bedroom.

(7) How is sex better than bowling? – The balls are lighter and you don’t have to change your shoes.

(8) Why do so many men enjoy fishing so much? – Because it’s the only time anyone says to them, “Wow! That’s a big one.”

(9) Where do men usually go to meet their friends? – The VD clinic.

(10) What’s the difference between a man and a cucumber? – A cucumber stays hard for longer.

(11) What four letter words offend men? – Don’t and Stop.

(12) Sex is like a bank account – after withdrawal you lose interest.

(13)     My doctor’s told me I have to give up half my sex life but I can’t decide which half to give up – talking about it or thinking about it.

(14)     When a man and a woman marry they become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Source: “Dirty Jokes for Women” by Liz Hughes. Published by Michael O’Mara Books Limited, London.

As most of the things we do are mundane and repetitious, many people will say that their work is boring. In fact, any work can be boring to the person who has to do it more than once. “Fish!” is a book written by Stephen C. Lundin, Harry Paul and John Christensen to boost our morale and improve results at work. Here are the Fish Philosophy taken from the book for us to learn.

(1) Choose Your Attitude

There is always a choice about the way we do our work, even if there is no choice about the work itself. We can always choose the attitude we bring to our work.

• By choosing our attitude, we demonstrate a level of personal accountability and pro-activity.
• Choosing our attitude will bring ourselves to work and to love the work we do.
• Choosing our attitude will bring the best qualities to our work as this is the choice we have chosen.
• We can bring a moody attitude to work and have a depressing day.
• We can bring a grouchy attitude to work and irritate our customers.
• We can bring a sunny, playful, cheerful attitude to work and have a great day.
• We can always quit our job, but this might not be a smart thing to do given our responsibilities and other factors.
• Since we are going to work, we might as well have the best day we can have.

(2) Play

Have fun while we work is good as fun is energising. There are many benefits for us to play while we work.

• Fun leads to creativity.
• Having a good time is healthy.
• Happy people treat others well.
• Time passes quickly while we play.
• Work becomes a reward and not just a way to reward.
• Having fun at work creates an innovative and accountable working environment.

(3) Make Their Day

Try to engage our customers in ways that will create energy and goodwill. The benefits of making our customers their day are:

• It is good for the organisation.
• It will focus our attention and get us away from our problems.
• It is healthy, we will feel good, and will unleash even more energy.
• Serving our customers well will give us satisfaction.

(4) Be Present

Be present when we are with our customers. Talk to our customers as if they are our long lost friends.

• Be fully engage in our work.
• Don’t daydream while we are working.
• Interact with our customers when they are with us.
• Be committed to being fully present when discussing an issue.
• Be present when our customers and team members most need us.
• When we are present with others we show consideration for the other people.

Source: Fish! by Stephen C. Lundin, Ph.D., Harry Paul, and John Christensen. Published by Hyperion, USA.

The ancient Romans have considered two statutes, a temple, a roof-top garden, two tombs and a lighthouse to be the seven great man-made wonders of the world. Six of these wonders have long been destroyed, some by nature and some desecrated by human. Only the great Pyramid of Giza still stands in its original form and is now the oldest wonder, built about 2560 BC.

(1) The Hanging Garden of Babylon

This garden, built by King Nebuchadnezzar II in about 600BC, was a mountain-like series of planted terraces. The whole garden covers 2,500 acres. The walls of the garden are 22 feet thick and 55 feet high. The bricks use to build the garden are enough to connect from earth to moon. The garden was destroyed by nature. Babylon is the Capital of Babylonia, which is now known as Iraq.

(2) The Statue of Zeus at Olympia

To the ancients, Zeus was the god of the sky and ruler of the Olympian gods. The statue of Zeus was built by the Greek sculptor Phidias in mid 5th century. The statue was made of ivory and gold and it stands nine metres (30 feet) tall. It was the central feature of the temple of Zeus at Olympia, Greece. Olympia was the ancient site for the Olympian Games.

(3) The Temple of Artemis at Ephesus

Artemis is the goddess of childbirth, of nature and of harvest in ancient times. The temple, which was 60 feet tall, was built in 356BC. It was later destroyed by the Goths in AD262. Ephesus is in Greece.

(4) The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus

These 140 feet tall monumental marble tombs, built in 353 BC, was decorated for King Mausolus of Caria in Asia Minor. Halicarnassus is now known as Bodrum, situated by the sea in Turkey.

(5) The Colossus of Rhodes

This was a 30 metres (100 feet) bronze statue of the Greek sun god Helios, erected about 280 BC to guard the entrance to the harbour of Rhodes, in Greece. The building of this statue takes 12 years to complete. The statue was destroyed about 55 years later by nature fall.

(6) The Pharos at Alexandrian

This lighthouse, built in the 3rd BC, was located on an island in the harbour of Alexandria, Egypt. This lighthouse was built with marble and was 134 metres (440 feet) tall. The purpose of building this lighthouse was life for ships as ships from 35 miles off the shore are able to see the lighthouse. It was destroyed in the 14th century.

(7) The Great Pyramid of Giza

This 42-storey high pyramid was built with 230 million limestone rocks in 3000 BC, in Northern Egypt. It took 100,000 workman and 30 years to compete the work.

The Seven Wonders of the world are seven works of art and architecture regarded by the ancient Greek and Romans observers as the most extraordinary structures of antiquity.

Note: Information are taken from the Reader’s Digest’s video tapes borrowed from the Jurong Community Library.

In his book “The Sour Pack” Ronald Chu identified and illustrated the credo and lifestyle of a clan of young people in society in a comical way. Here are some of the illustrations taken from the book; perhaps you could find some of them familiar to you.

Woman: Am I beautiful?

Man: You’re a dark beauty.

Woman:         What does that mean?

Man: You’re really beautiful in total darkness.

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Man: Someone says that I’m predestined to have two wives.

Woman: Does it mean you’re going to have another woman?

Man: You’re already two different women before and after you make up.

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Woman: Let’s married on Valentine’s Day.

Man: Do you really think we’re suited for each other?

Woman: If we aren’t, we can divorce on April Fool’s Day.

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Man: Are we suitable for marriage since we differ so much in character?

Woman: I know there’s a huge gap in our thinking. But I’m still willing to give it a try.

Man: All right. If we aren’t suited for marriage, at least we’ll be suited for divorce.

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Woman: If we marry, where should we solemnize our marriage?

Man: Las Vegas.

Woman: Why?

Man: Where else shall we go for such a big gamble?

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Woman A: If you pick money as the basis for choosing a mate, you’re a realistic woman. If you pick love, you’re an idealistic woman and if you pick ability, you’re an intelligent woman.

Woman B: What if I pick all?

Woman A: The you’re an ordinary woman.

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Woman A: How can I make a man take a second look at me?

Woman B: Don’t let him have a first good look at you.

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Woman A: How does one prevent a man affection from going off the track?

Woman B: Don’t let his career gets on the right track.

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Woman A: What sort of man is suitable for a husband? A smart man or a foolish man?

Woman B: Neither. It should be a man willing to be a husband.

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Woman A: You way your dress shows off your character.

Woman B: What if I don’t dress anything?

Woman A: That will show off your boy friend’s character.

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Source: “The Sour Pack” by Ronald Chu, translated by Alan Chong. Published by Asiapac Book Pte Ltd

Allan and Barbara Pease produced a book “Why women can’t read maps …… and won’t stop talking” to help readers to learn more about women so that interaction and relationships with women can be more fulfilling, enjoyable and satisfying. Here are of the some points I have taken from the book for us to learn.

(1)       A man won’t admit mistakes because he thinks she won’t love him. But the reality is, a woman will love a man more if he admits his mistake.

(2)       When you are dealing with an upset woman, do not offer any solutions or invalidate her feelings – just show her that you are listening.

(3)       Don’t become angry when a woman gives you advice. For her, offering advice builds trust in a relationship and is not seen as a sign of weakness.

(4)       Talking about her problems is how a woman gets relief from stress. What she wants from you is to listen, not to offer solutions.

(5)       Tell her about your problems. For a woman, sharing problems is a sign of trust and friendship.

(6)       A woman loves to receive a card from a man. Buy an empty card and get another woman to teach you how to write a great message.

(7)       How much a man earns is not the most important thing to a woman. When a woman leaves a man, it is not because she is unhappy with what he can provide, but because she is emotionally unfulfilled.

(8)       Allow women to choose your clothing. Men are often colour blind to blue, red, or green and their brains have limited ability to match patterns and designs.

(9)       Do not criticise a woman for telling you to turn right when she really meant left. Women have difficulty telling their left from their right hand because most women use both sides of their brain for this task.

(10)     For women, speech has a clear purpose: to build relationships and make friends – not to solve problems.

(11)     When a woman talks at the end of the day, she doesn’t want interruptions with solutions to her problems.You are expected not to respond, just to listen.

(12)     To get on better with women, talk more. If a man is with a group of women, his lack of talks will make women think that he is distant, sulky or doesn’t want to join in.

(13)     Talking about day-to-day problems is how modern women cope with stress. They see it as bonding and being supportive.

(14)     A woman is four to six times more likely to touch another person in a social conversation than a man. Don’t misread a friendly touch.

(15)     A woman talks to show participation and build relationships. If a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes you. If she’s not talking to you, you’re in trouble.

(16)     A woman’s talk is unstructured and several subjects can be discussed at any one time with no conclusions being reach. For women, talking is just like shopping.

(17)     Never insist a woman to park her car if she doesn’t want to. Estimating the distance between the car bumper and the garage wall while moving is a spatial skill most women are not strong in.

(18)     If a woman asks you to choose between a pair of blue or gold shoes, don’t do it. If you choose, you’ll always be wrong. Ask her which one she has chosen and give her confirmation why this is an excellent choice.

(19)     A woman reads the meaning of what is being said through voice intonation and the speaker’s body language. This is exactly what you need to do to capture and keep her attention.

(20)     Women love men who can dance.

(21)     Most women will prefer to receive emotion-limited gifts like flowers and cards than practical gifts like toaster or car-jack.

Source : “Why women can’t read maps…. And won’t stop talking” by Allan & Barbara Pease. Published by Pease Training International Pty. Ltd, Australia.

Here are some points I have taken from the book “The One Minute Manager” about One Minute Management.

• Most companies spend more time and money on maintaining their buildings and equipment than they do on maintaining and developing people.
• In some organisations managers know what they want their people to do but these managers just tell their people in such ways assuming that their people should know want they want.
• Effective managers manager themselves and the people they work with so that both the organisation and the people profit from their presence.
• People who feel good about themselves produce good results. Helping people to feel good about themselves is a key to getting more things done.
• Most managers wait until their people do something right before they praise them. As a result, many people never get to become high performers because their managers concentrate on catching them doing things wrong.
• Be positive! When see someone doing something right, praise him or her. It is wrong to spend time catching people doing something wrong. Help people reach their full potential by catching them doing something right.
• Be sincere! Specifies exactly what people did right and be consistent in the praising.
• Remember that people are not pigeons. People are more complicated. They are aware and they able to think for themselves. They certainly do not want to be manipulated by another person. Respect is a key to good management.

Source: “The One Minute Manager” by Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson. Published by HarperCollins Publishers Inc.

In Singapore, we often hear people speaking with an ending ah or lah during conversations. These are known as tail-words and they do not carry any meaning by themselves. The rules in using tail words will come naturally when we get exposed to Singlish (Singapore English). Here are some commonly used tail-words that can be found in Singapore.

(1) Ah – Has a wide array of meanings, ranging from emphasis to being used as a question, depending on the intonation.
Examples : (a) You’re not coming-ah? (b) Thanks so much-ah. I really appreciate your help.

(2) Lah – Borrowed from Malay or the Chinese dialects. Does not have any meaning by itself but it is used for a variety of reasons, ranging from emphasis to softening the message.
Examples : (a) So sorry-lah. I completely forgot. (b) I don’t know lah. You ask her and see-lah!

(3) Meh – Usually used as a mild form of questioning. It is of Cantonese origin.
Examples : (a) I want to talk to you, cannot-meh? (b) You think you are so big-meh?

(4) One – This is pronounced as ‘waan’.
Examples : (a) Everything you ask, you sure get one! (b) I don’t want to go one but they asked me to come.

(5) What – Pronounced as ‘wut’. Used for emphasis.
Examples : “I don’t want to go what. Cannot-meh?”. “I told you already what! Why you always ask me the same questions?”

(6) Man – Not borrowed from any of the local languages or dialects. It might have originated from the Black English, as a result of influence from the mass media.
Examples : “Don’t try to be funny, man”. “I don’t get it, man!”

Source : “Manglish: Malaysian English at its wackiest!” by Lee Su Kim. Published by Times Books International, an imprint of Times Editions Pte Ltd.

(1) Also
In SgE, also tends to occur in one of two positions. It may occur immediately after the subject: ‘I also don’t know’. This tends to happen when also qualifies the subject (in this case, I). Alternatively, it may occur at the end of the sentence: ‘He sells cars also’. This tends to occur when also qualifies some other element in the sentence (in this case cars).

In GenE, also normally occurs before the main verb (or after a main verb be), regardless of the sentence which it qualifies: ‘He also sells cars’, ‘I am also a Libra’. If a GenE speaker wishes to ass an element at the end of the sentence, it has to be too or as well, not also: ‘I am a Libra too’, ‘He sells cars as well’.

(2) Irregardless
The words regardless and irrespective have identical meanings; compare “He carried on regardless/ irrespective of the danger”. However, these two words are regularly blended by many SgE speakers to give the new form irregardless: ‘He carried on irregardless of the danger’.

(3) Last time
The phase last time is used in SgE to mean ‘previously’ or even ‘a long time ago’, perhaps in the speaker’s childhood: ‘Last time I worked at Chan Brothers’. ‘Last time Raffles Hotel was on the seafront’.

In GenE, there are two meanings to the word time, one uncountable (Can you tell me the time?) and one countable (How many times has Mr Lee phoned?). Last time can only refer to the countable sense, and therefore means ‘on the last occasion’: ‘I am confident of passing my driving test this time. Last time I only failed by two points’.

(4) Like what
The phrase like what occurs in two main expressions in SgE: ‘So like what’ and ‘like what like that’. In both, like what means that something is so bad that words fail to describe. This could be used of almost anything: someone’s poor dress sense, a tastelessly flashy car, someone’s objectionable behaviour.

(5) Put up
The verb regularly used in SgE for staging a show is put up: ‘They put up a performance of Hamlet’. However, there is another meaning to the verb put up in SgE, namely ‘live’; for example, ‘Where do you put up?’ means ‘Where do you live?’ This verb has a similar meaning in GenE, but always refers to temporary accommodation. ‘We can put you up in the spare bedroom’ or ‘We’ll put up with friends for the night’. The SgE usage does not carry the same overtones of temporariness.

(6) Stay
In SgE, the question ‘Where do you stay?’ does not imply any kind of temporary arrangement, as it does in GenE (e.g. staying in a hotel). It is equivalent to the GenE ‘Where do you live?’ (to describe a long-term situation)

(7) Throw
The word throw in SgE covers the meaning expressed by both GenE throw and throw away. In GenE, for throw away, the particle away must be there: ‘He threw away the torn shirt’. The SgE sentence ‘He threw the torn shirt’ is ambiguous to GenE speakers as it may mean either ‘he discarded the shirt as useless’ or ‘he propelled the shirt through the air with his hand’.

Source : “Making Sense of Singapore English” by Adam Brown. Published by Federal Publications (S) Pte Ltd.